Hey. I just got back from Florida. The past couple weeks have been busy. Leslie was here. Brian was here. I was in Florida. Leslie and I hung out. Brian and I hung out and made a movie. I went to Busch Gardens and the beach in Florida. Today on the way home we discovered that overnight an entire colony of ants moved into our car. I hate bugs. We spent like 9 hours squashing ants because they kept crawling on us. If they had the sense to stay in the damn trunk and not get on us they would have survived the trip. But now the car is full of dead ants. There was also a huge fly in the car. Dad poked at it with a book to get it to fly out. It was like two inches long and fat. It just looked at the book and was like "Bitch, I ain't moving." So he pushed it behind the back seat. It came and terrorized us later on the road. Dad squished it and it was gross. Now my book has goobers all over it. I did however finish my latest book "Running With Scissors." It was good. Very entertaining. I really could have done without the graphic depictions of gay sex, but that's really not a slam on gays, it's more the fact that I could really always do without graphic depictions of any sex. But it was incredibly engrossing, that guy had a messed up childhood.

You'd think after so long I'd have something to say. You'd be wrong.

To the guy who signed our last post, you signed Brian's post. He is from Virginia. I, however, am from Fort Collins. I don't work at Papa John's, I work at Subway on the CSU campus. It was an honest mistake and I got the message anyway. You're not the first to be confused by our weird two author deal here. So yeah. Hey man. What up.

My grandparents in Florida are weird. Last night after we got back from Busch Gardens Grandpa Murray had printed out a list of 13 principles to lead an effective life and handed one out to each of us, including my dad. He then went over each item in detail. It was like being in school. In fact, all the time we spent with them was like being in school. It's not like meeting with family, it's like taking an oral test. I am apparently a failure because A)I'm an english major which is equivalent to throwing thousands of dollars and four years of your life away and B)I haven't planned what I want to do after school. I apologize to everyone for my lack of direction, I never realized how offensive my behavior was. I'd shape up but I'm too damn stupid.

If you're reading this and you know me, you're invited to come down to a barbecue in Greeley on August 14th. My girlfriend and some of her friends got the idea to throw me a welcome home BBQ. So if she gets to have friends over, so do I. So email me if you want to come, or leave a comment or something. I'll mull over the list of people and invite only the best and brightest.

I haven't slept well in days. I keep waking up at six and not being able to fall back to sleep. Therefore I am either very fun or really boring to talk to, since I don't know what the hell is going on. Like right now, I'm not sure what I'm typing. I think this may have something to do with the fact that my girlfriend is in Seattle with many male friends of hers. I'm insecure as Charlie knows because I feel I have very little to offer in the way of... anything, really. So that could be why I'm not sleeping. Another reason may be the constant fear I live in because of all the terrorist threats.

Timesplitters 2 is cool. Hey, Charlie's having a rough time it sounds like. Comfort him because he doesn't deserve to be unhappy.

Blah blah blah. I think I'm dying. Wait no, still just tired. I have a short story I'm technically working on. You can read it if you're nice. Send gifts. Later.

PS- I ain't proofreading this, so if you want to bitch about my typos, kiss my black ass.