Friday, May 20, 2005

So hey, I think it's time I make a new post here, regardless of the fact that I have nothing in particular to discuss. It's been, what, two months and some change since I've last graced you with my presence (i.e. wasted your time), so maybe that's just long enough for me to have something interesting to say!

A quick summary of two months, in less than one hundred and twelve words: MACRoCk was, as always, awesome (check out: Black Mountain, Magnolia Electric Company, Living Legends, Ahleuchatistas [they use music as a blunt instrument and do not fear hitting you over the head with it, repeatedly -- but it's awesome)] and then a few other bands I cannot remember after so long); a four week crazy marathon of class work that brought me to the brink of a nervous breakdown; finals week, which, in comparison, was a joke; a much-too-short week of relaxtion; and then back here for Astronomy during May session, with a teacher who looks, and acts, like a mix between Napoleon Dynamite (if he were a red head) and a Mormon. Enough said.

Speaking of my astronomy teacher, here are a few jems I'd like to share, to give you an idea of what a weird character this guy is:
1. (this is taken completely out of context, but I don't care) He said, in a condescending tone, "The Greeks got right some things."
2. He started off class the second day by mentioning how he ran over a rabbit on his way to work. Consequently, this earned him the "story of the day" award, which I can only imagine is a fierce and intense battle-of-the-ages held on a daily basis between him and his wife, the champion of which has to resort to bloodshed to ensure victory. Or something.
3. He thinks we should stop using the hard to pronounce, yet amazingly cool, Arabic names for stars, and replace them with their easy to pronounce English translations, leaving you with stars named "Bright Star" or "Red Star" or "Armpit."
4. He "watch[es] a lot of TV" (anyone who needs evidence that watching a lot TV has adverse effects, look no further). Best of all, he watches Cops, followed by America's Most Wanted. On a Saturday night.
5. It takes him, on average, 18 minutes to officially start class.

That's all I can think of for now. Stay tuned for more, as it's only been one week. Just imagine what kind of trinkets I'll have come three weeks from now!

Oh, something I forgot to mention in the quick summary: Next year, WXJM is moving from Anthony-Seeger to a new building. So I had my very last radio show in the old station during exam week. Originally, I planned to do a recap of the semester show, but since Yannos couldn't make it, it just didn't feel the same. So I never got around to playing some of the songs I wanted to. Which, finally, leads me to my point: Earlier in the semester, we had a show close to Bush's inauguration. As a form of protest, I wrote a tongue-in-cheek song singing the praises of our great leader. And for the exam week show I was gonna play the song, but with revised lyrics. Since a lot of shit happened in those four months. Here, for the first time ever, are those lyrics. Gotta love those crazy Republicans!

Oh I'm so happy we have such stability
Secured in the office of our presidency.
'Cause we have to keep a woman alive who's already been declared dead.
It beats allowing two guys from ever getting happily wed.

And social security, I think that's best left up to me.
With an IQ of 82, investing and protecting my life savings is a breeze.
Sure, gas is more expensive, but that's no economic crisis.
I'm content so long as I keep seeing Walmart's falling prices.

So sing with us now the praises of our bestest president.
'Cause we hold these truths to be oh so self evident.

Bill Frist is a cool dude, he thinks you can get AIDS from sweat.
And Tom DeLay, well, he can't possibly be a crook and a liar, I'd bet
it's just the liberal media that's distorting the truth.
I heard that from Bill O'Reilly, and for me that's enough proof.

And just who do these liberals think they are, wanting to filibuster?
I just don't know how much more of my compassionate conservatism for them I can muster.
'Cause it's not my right, it's my responsibility, to own guns.
And that AK-47 sure is looking swell next to the 19 other ones.

So sing with us now the praises of our bestest president.
'Cause we hold these truths to be oh so self evident:
that he's our bestest president,
a c-average student,
our president.

I don't really know how to segue from that to something else, so how's this: Here are my thoughts on reincarnation: I don't think it exists. Hey, I'm all for it, I think it's a way cool idea and if you think that's what happens when we die, then good for you. But here's my deal with the whole concept: it seems to me that it would destroy any sort of linear concept we have of time. How? Well, by this point in time, all of us would have many many many many past lives. Slice us open, and you'd see more rings than the trees in the Amazon and the California red woods have, combined. So, if we have each lived so many different lives -- and, most importantly -- at different times, then how is it that we are all living this life right now? Why do I only have the consciousness of this 21 year old male named Brian? Because our memories are wiped clean after every reincarnation? Maybe. But then why am I Brian, living presently in 2005? Why am I not someone from some other time in the past? And why couldn't I be someone living 500 years now? Because you have to die before you are reincarnated, that's the obvious answer. But what happens to my mind/spirit/soul/whatever, then? How can a part of me go on when I don't even know what the previous concept of me is? And what's preventing me from cycling through my future lives and is holding me in place at this current one? It seems like we'd be connected between our lives from the past and the lives we will live in the future, even if we don't have an awareness of those lives. And, because of that, there can't be any real linear progression of time, since it's just a jumbled mess. I don't know if I explained that very well, and there's probably lots of holes in my argument, but that's what philosophy majors are for. So feel free to debunk that theory however you please.

Whoa. That was too much thinking. I'm not even sure I follow myself. So let's move on to music. Songs you need to listen to: Boz Scaggs' "Loan Me a Dime," Max Richter's "On the Nature of Daylight," and Party Ben's "Walking with a Ghost in Paris." Also, if you haven't checked out his mashup of Green Day and Oasis, check that out first. CDs you should listen to: the Finding Neverland soundtrack, Weezer's latest effort (just since it's Weezer, and it's pretty good), Say Hi to Your Mom's "Ferocious Mopes" (listen closely to the lyrics to the song "Dimensions and Verticals"), and I found this string quartet tribute to Elliott Smith that's pretty kick ass.

Books! Fun reading season has begun, and it's been an exciting time. Al Franken's "Lies: and the Lying Liars who Tell Them" is an incredible book; Chuck Palahniuk's latest effort, "Haunted," is the sickest, most disgusting book I've ever read, but still gets my seal of approval since the short stories are incredible (90% of them) and it's an interesting look at our culture; "House of Leaves" by Mark Z. Danielewski is a ridiculously complex book with 4 layers (a guy, Johnny Truant, discovers the manuscript for a book written by an old blind recluse named Zampano. The book is about a film about the Navidson family, who moves into a house that does some fucked up shit. What exactly, I don't know, I haven't read that far). I have a feeling this book will freak me out, since stuff about old houses that do crazy shit scares me like nothing else. But the complexity of the book has me hooked, I love stuff that works on several layers at once.

Okay, this is much too long. If you're still reading this then you're either really bored or... really bored. Thank you for your time. Remember: life may suck, but at least you're not living in the Middle Ages, or feudal China (as a serf), or before electricity was invented, or back when "Beowulf" could be considered an edge-of-your-seat thriller. Sure, maybe you lived through all that in your past lives, but you're here now, let's learn something from it. Remember when you were a kid and were excited about everything, no matter how miniscule, how asinine, how inane (Hell yes, those are 8th grade vocab words right there!)? That child is still a part of you. Let's all act like kids again.

Friday, May 06, 2005

It is time for me to create a new post. So much has... not happened.

I am looking forward to summer. Cam and I are going to live in this sweet apartment way down south of town that's way nicer a place than either of us should be able to afford, but we're getting a deal on it. I was talking to Aja today and it turns out that she and her boyfriend are moving into an apartment right across the hall from us. That's just plain weird, but on the plus side, I'll have my cribbage buddy right next door, basically. Then we just signed the lease for the place we'll be living next semester, and it's also 25o a month. Hooray for cheapness. That place is like a garbage can compared to the place we'll be living during the summer, but I like it quite a bit. It has "character," and you can interpret that basically how you want to, and it would probably be right.

On the job front, I have a couple things open right now. Jiffy Lube called me and said I should come in and interview for a job with them. That might be fun but I don't know anything about cars so I might not get the job. I also applied for several jobs requiring resumes, which is a bold new frontier for me, and one company, an insurance company, has already contacted me and sent me a "prequalification interview" which I promptly filled out and returned. This job would pay 9 bucks an hour starting and would be full time, 8:30-5 Monday through Friday, and I think this would be the job to go for, as it would be great to put on a resume. Then I would finally have something on there besides "Sandwich Artist: Duties: Make sandwiches, be treated like a bitch."

Speaking of resumes, they're a weird beast. I forgot how to write a resume because I took a class about it at some point in high school and haven't written one since then. So I got on the internet and figured out what all's supposed to go in a resume. So basically a resume is a nice way to say "Lie to me about what you've done at your jobs in the past." Because what I do at Subway is make food and be treated like a bitch. But what I wrote on the resume sounded much more poetic. "Involved in all aspects of customer service, from making the food to answering the phones, answering questions and taking orders." That's just one of about eight points I made using vague language that made it sound like what I do is real work. Technically, I'm not lying. But I still felt a little dirty after I wrote all that.

There are a couple things I'm getting tired of. One, I don't currently, never have in the past, and probably never will in the future think that drinking alcohol is cool. People who tell me how much they drank, then blacked out/threw up/"hooked up" with some stranger are not impressing me, though they seem to think they are. Drinking a lot and being stupid are not skills. Vomiting is not something I like to do. I generally enjoy being able to remember where I've been and what I've done. And finally, I'm old fashioned and I think that relationships are the way to go. But I'm not moral and I'm going to hell because I'm not Christian. Whatever.

Secondly, a lot of dudes have been talking to me about their sexual escapades recently. Cam and I are of the school where we don't so much talk about that stuff. For me, anyway, it's again not something to brag about. It's a personal thing, and it's meaningful, and I don't really care about the "quickie" you got from some girl before work. If these people cared about the people they're with, they wouldn't go around divulging that information.

And third, girls will not look me in the eye. I don't know if it's just me, or if it's all guys, but they seem to have a major problem with eye contact. I think this is due to the unfortunate fact that they've been taught that all guys are trying to do all the time is get in their pants. Don't get me wrong, that's completely true, but we could at least go around pretending like we're just having a conversation. When I talk to people I like to look them in the eye, and it bugs me when I'm not getting any eye contact in return. There's nothing sexual about my asking if you want chips or a drink with that. I'm miserable, I'm doing my job, and the last thing on my mind is sex. The first thing on my mind is "Six days left of this job." That's actually the only thing on my mind, besides the usual "I hate you" or "I hate this job" or "I hate (insert noun here)."

Moving on to music, I think everyone should listen to the Glow. They're like an oldies band but new. It's way good, organ driven rock music. A couple songs even have the old "shoobie doo wop" backing vocals. It's a trip. I also still think that punk rock is the best music on the planet. Though I'm getting away from it a little bit, the raw passion that punk can have is amazing. This is found mostly in new punk bands, and they generally lose it when they sign to a big label. Sometimes I just want noise, I just want to turn off my brain and thrash around on the ground and scream at the top of my lungs, because then, for a minute, everything fades and everything is okay again.