Here's something that troubles me: On IMDB's Top 250 movies as voted by their users, all three Lord of the Rings movies make it in the top 10. Ok, now, admittedly it's my own fault for seeing the third movie without knowing anything about the other two, but still. Was it visually impressive? Sure. Was it entertaining? Why not. Was it so great it belongs among the top 10 movies of all time? Doubtful. I mean, how can those three movies beat out such awesome films as The Usual Suspects, Rear Window, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Dr. Strangelove, Memento, American Beauty, and a slew of others? I don't get it. However, if there's one thing I do like on that list, it's Citizen Kane not making the top 10 by a hair. I understand its importance, but if you make me watch that movie one more time, I'll projectile vomit on your face, Exorcist style. Like that? A movie joke when I'm talking about movies... Yeah, no one cares.

Here's something else that troubles me: The Old Navy commercial(s) where they take a well known and highly despised Christmas carol and change the words to fit whatever it is they're trying to sell. Old Navy has really done a great job producing commercials that make me want to chuck the TV out the window whenever one of their spots comes on. Remember that one from last summer, or two summers ago, with the ultra-buff surfer guy saying, "Toes on the nose, bro!" Yeah, that's a good enough excuse to execute the genius who came up with that lovely line.

I'm really not feeling that Scrooge-ish or anything, but that commercial makes me think bad thoughts about the holiday season. So, for the record, I'm not really that humbuggish.

Adam's birthday is today/tomorrow/last week, depending on when you're reading this. So let's all take a moment to, with fancy font techniques, wish him a Happy Birthday. That looks way too girly, but I don't care enough to change it. And, much like the nice message he ended with in his last entry (creating a nice contrast with my curmudgeonly entry), I'd like to wish the fine people I know a wonderful holiday season and a great new year. If you read this, then you fall under that category. And if you don't read this, then you're none the wiser, so I won't have to mention you anyway, jackass.

I went to the dentist yesterday. That's always a pleasant and enjoyable experience, huh? So they told me I have a cavity (albeit a very, very small one) on my back molar. What's up with this? I brush my teeth at least twice a day (and for a very long time) and I floss! I floss, damn it! Shouldn't that count for anything? But I guess not. A cavity is my punishment. Figures. Moral of the story: Don't floss, it doesn't account for shit. I guess I can grow up to be that 5th dentist, then. The one, just to spite statistics, that refuses to go with the consensus.

In other news, today we finally broke free from the shackles of a dial-up modem and converted to Verizon DSL. It's great. And my soul feels healed from not having to rely on AOL any longer. I think I might just be a better person from here on out. Now, don't go thinking these crazy thoughts like "Oh, that means he'll be able to update this thing more often!" or anything, since that's just not happening. But hey, who knows. Stranger things have happened.

It's winter break and that means no reading for me. Well, that's not true, since I've been reading America: The Book by Jon Stewart and the other funny and intelligent writers of The Daily Show. It's hilarious, as if "by Jon Stewart and the other funny and intelligent writers of The Daily Show" wasn't a give-away. Highly recommended, so pick it up you hooligans.

All right, I think I've wasted enough of everyone's time. But before I go, let me leave you with these words: This is a time to be happy. We're all discouraged, we're all fed-up, we're all tired of something, but hey, let's forget about that for a little while. It's going to be 2005 soon. 2005. How crazy is that? Remember all the Y2K hype? Remember the excitement that came along with the approach of the first palindromatic year of the millennium? Remember how we all looked forward to 2004 with hopes that we'd be able to evict that moron Bush out of office by the end of the year? Well, that's all past. It's done. Let's bury our defeat with the other days and weeks and months and years we've already catalogued. This is a new chapter, and it's labeled "All The Things You Could Want... And Then Some." And it's opening at a theater near you. Check it out sometime.