I've made a couple interesting discoveries using the automated word-creating function thing with text messages. (That's the technical term for it, by the way. "Automated word-creating function thing.") For instance, if you type in "convert," the first thing that pops up is "contest." See, even text messaging software knows that converting people to a certain religion is a contest. (Bad joke. Boos are an appropriate reaction. My material gets better, though.) I think I've already mentioned the Brian = Asian thing, which is just odd. But the best one is that if you type in "book," it'll come up "cool." Thus definitively proving that reading is, in fact, hip, jive, neat-o, madd kewlz.

The Academy Awards are tonight. I'm somewhat interested in watching, but, alas, my poor little rabbit ears don't pick up ABC. Of the 92 movies nominated for best picture, I've seen five: Avatar, The Hurt Locker, Inglorious Basterds, Up, and Up in the Air. I wanted to see Precious, I just never got around to it. (And we all know that, once the Oscars are over, that opportunity is lost and gone forever.) Avatar was flashy with no substance. The Hurt Locker was suspenseful with no grounding in reality. Inglorious Basterds is my favorite of the lot and a solid movie all around. Up was good-but-not-great. And Up in the Air was kind of a disappointment, to me. (Jason Reitman, what's the deal? I loved Thank You For Smoking. Juno was a mess, but I blame that mostly on Diablo Cody's script. And Up in the Air was just... I don't know, too George Clooney-y.) So what be your pick for tonight's winner? I'm expecting a shocking turn of a events when Couples Retreat gets entered as a last-minute addition to all the categories and becomes the first film in history to sweep every single award.